venerdì 5 luglio 2013

Fangirl - Rainbow Rowell


IL LIBRO IN PILLOLE: Uno dei miei libri preferiti!

**Fatto random prima della recensione: L'autrice si chiama Rainbow . Come si fa a non amarla già solo per questo?! Come? Come? Ecco, non si può. La si ama e basta!**
**Fatto random prima della recensione #2: Sul kindle ho sottolineato praticamente metà libro.. Le citazioni sono ben visibili in appositi riquadri.. Ad un certo punto ho dovuto smettere di inserirle nella recensione e sono tutte in fondo :DD**

Questo libro è la perfezione.
Lo amo, lo venero e sento la necessità di possederlo cartaceo seduta stante.. Avere l'ebook non è sufficiente, ho bisogno di sfogliarlo e leggere pagine a caso.. Mi sono innamorata perdutamente, ecco la verità!
Non avevo minimamente previsto che avrebbe potuto piacermi così tanto e così intensamente.. Io ho scelto di leggerlo perché la copertina è carinissima e il titolo.. Beh, credo rispecchi -per un terzo, un quarto, a metà, totalmente, verso l'infinito e oltre, decidete voi!!- la condizione di noi lettrici, estimatrici di film, serie tv e via discorrendo.
Tutti noi abbiamo degli amori un po' fetish per saghe, personaggi maschili che ci fanno arrostire gli ormoni e attori semplicemente 'sbav'.. E sicuramente tutti noi almeno una volta abbiamo immaginato uno svolgimento diverso nelle trame..
Ecco, questo libro siamo noi. Questo libro è lo specchio in cui ci riflettiamo, un libro che parla di noi.. Volevo assolutamente leggerlo, mi ha attratto a sé come pochi libri riescono a fare!!
Scrivere questa recensione si sta rivelando più difficile del previsto perché ho finito il libro da tre giorni ma mi manca il coraggio di applicarmi e riportare nero su bianco quanto possa essermi piaciuto.. L'ho scritta e riscritta mille volte, ho guardato lo schermo con occhi vitrei (e nel frattempo mi sono sparata due/tre puntate di "Dieci cose che odio di te".. :D) e ancora penso di star banalizzando il tutto e di non riuscire a trasmette quanto sono andata in fissa :DD
Del caso trovaste le mie parole banali, tenete comunque a mente che è entrato di prepotenza nella top five dei miei preferiti :3

La cosa che più ho amato sono stati i personaggi. Tutti, dal primo all'ultimo sono tratteggiati in modo perfetto, sono umani per davvero e non ho mai avuto la sensazione opprimente che a volte si fa strada in me di personaggi troppo perfetti per essere veri.. Levi e Cath sono così vivi, così pieni di difetti, così imperfetti che li ho sentiti vicini a me, REALI. A costo di essere ripetitiva - perché l'ho già detto nella recensione di "Eyes ever to the sky" - io amo i personaggi figoni che mi fanno sbavare e che sono al top.. Ma mi piace anche avere persone normali con le mie stesse paure, le mie stesse ansie e debolezze.. E magari qualche difettuccio:

She and Wren were both bottom heavy—Cath liked to wear shirts and sweaters that she could pull down over her hips;

Ed è proprio quello che ho trovato in questo libro.. In particolar modo con Cath. Io la amo profondamente, forse perché mi è sembrato - in molti casi e se non si tiene conto che io non solo non so scrivere fanfiction, ma probabilmente non saprei nemmeno descrivere in modo decente la mia giornata tipo - che si stesse parlando di me. Cath ha una sorella gemella, Wren, ma a differenza sua non vuole conoscere nuova gente, non vuole gettarsi con entusiasmo nella nuova vita rappresentata dal college con tutti i cambiamenti che essa comporta ma vorrebbe continuare la sua tranquilla esistenza a fianco (o sarebbe meglio dire all'ombra?) della sorella e scrivere insieme fanfiction sulla serie di Simon Snow (E qui ci ritorno!!). Odia le novità, odia l'idea di dover andare a mensa e scegliere il tavolo, tanto per dirne una; sta bene nella sua stanza..

She finished getting ready with plenty of time to eat breakfast but didn’t feel up to braving the dining hall; she didn’t know where it was, or how it worked.… In new situations, all the trickiest rules are the ones nobody bothers to explain to you. (And the ones you can’t google.) Like, where does the line start? What food can you take? Where are you supposed to stand, then where are you supposed to sit? Where do you go when you’re done, why is everyone watching you?… Bah. Cath broke open a box of protein bars. She had four more boxes and three giant jars of peanut butter shoved under her bed. If she paced herself, she might not have to face the dining hall until October.

“It’s not just that.… I don’t like new places. New situations. There’ll be all those people, and I won’t know where to sit—I don’t want to go.”

Cath wasn’t trying to make new friends here. In some cases, she was actively trying not to make friends, though she usually stopped short of being rude. (Uptight, tense, and mildly misanthropic? Yes. Rude? No.)

“No,” Cath said, “seriously. Look at you. You’ve got your shit together, you’re not scared of anything. I’m scared of everything. And I’m crazy. Like maybe you think I’m a little crazy, but I only ever let people see the tip of my crazy iceberg. Underneath this veneer of slightly crazy and mildly socially retarded, I’m a complete disaster.” Reagan rolled her eyes again. Cath made a mental note to stop rolling her eyes at people.

She didn’t want to go to Levi’s party. Even though she liked him, she didn’t like parties. And she didn’t want the first time she saw him after what had happened to be at a party. With party people. With any people.

By the time they got to the door, Cath’s stomach had realized what was happening. It twisted painfully, and she could feel her breath coming and going too soon. She couldn’t believe she was doing this. Boy. Party. Strangers. Beer. Strangers. Party. Boy. Eye contact.

Eccomi. Sono io!! E' la mia later-ego libresca!
Ebbene sì. Sono una persona asociale, odio i posti affollati, le novità e i cambiamenti mi terrorizzano e -beh sì - mi mandano fuori di testa.. Per non parlare dell'idea di una festa con sconosciuti: magari poi mi diverto un casino, ma il prima.. Il prima è traumatico.

It was different being with him now. Different even from a few hours ago. Fun. Cath didn’t feel like her real self was buried under eight layers of fear and diagnosable anxiety.

[Sì, sono una mezza sciroccata. Ora si capisce perché i miei migliori amici e compagni siano i libri, no? :D]
Quindi man mano che proseguivo nella lettura, mi sono sempre più identificata in Cath, l'ho sentita vicinissima e non ho potuto fare a meno di amarla *_*
Poi vabbé, il fatto che lei sia una lettrice e scrittrice, non poteva che giocare a suo favore.. Sì, ho un debole per i personaggi nerd e lettori. I lettori in un libro sono il top, c'è poco da fare!

“Did you get lost in the library?” “No.” “I always get lost in the library,” he said, “no matter how many times I go. In fact, I think I get lost there more, the more that I go. Like it’s getting to know me and revealing new passages.” “You spend a lot of time in the library?” “I do, actually.”

Come non parlare poi di Levi! Levi è.. Levi è tutto ciò che una persona potrebbe desiderare, è meraviglioso!  La cosa che ti colpisce come una valanga è come lui sorrida sempre. Sempre e comunque, fino a diventare contagioso.. Mi ha messo addosso un allegria incredibile! All'inizio ho preso la cosa con diffidenza perché immaginavo tutto un altro sviluppo di trama che grazie al Signore non c'è stata, ma poi mi sono ritrovata ad aspettare con ansia ogni suo sorriso.. Che tenerezza ♥ e che dolcezza!!! ♥

Levi’s smile broke free and devoured his whole face. It started to devour her face, too.

Lui è un amore poi: il suo prendersi cura di Cath, il suo modo di amarla e l'accontentarsi anche di stare vicino a lei quando Cath non si sente pronta per lasciarsi andare.. Mi ha quasi commosso, giuro!

And then she called Levi. He answered right away. “Cath?” “Hey, Levi. Um, how are you?” “Fine. I’m just … working.” “Do you usually answer your phone at work?” “No.” “Oh. Well, um, later when you get off, is there any chance you could drive me to Omaha? I know it’s a big hassle, and I’ll give you gas money. It’s just, sort of, a family emergency.” “I’ll come get you now. Give me fifteen.” “No. Levi, it can wait, if you’re at work.” “Is it a family emergency?” “Yeah,” she said quietly. “See you in fifteen.”

“Are you too worried about your dad to talk about why you’re mad at me?” His mouth was full. “It’s not important,” she muttered. “It is to me.” He swallowed. “You leave the room every time I walk in.” Cath didn’t say anything, so he kept talking.… “Is it because of what happened?”

“What do we have in common?” “We like each other,” he said. “What more is there? Also, compared to the rest of the world, we have everything in common. If aliens came down to earth, they probably wouldn’t even be able to tell us apart.”

“I’ve told you. It’s just too much … your house. Your room. We’ll walk in, and all that will be in there is a bed. And I’ll throw up from nerves.” “And desire?” “Mostly nerves,” she said. “Why is this such a big deal? All your room has in it is a bed.” “Two beds,” she said, “and two desks. And the constant threat of my roommate walking in.” “Which is why we should go to my house. Nobody will ever walk in on us.” “That’s what makes me nervous.” Levi hmmmed. Like he was thinking. “What if I promise not to touch you?” Cath laughed. “Now I have zero incentive to come.” “What if I promise to let you touch me first?” “Are you kidding? I’m the untrustworthy person in this relationship. I’m all hands.” “I’ve seen no evidence of that, Cather.” “In my head, I’m all hands.” “I want to live in your head.”
If you knew that I wasn’t pushing for that, if that wasn’t even on the horizon, do you think you could relax and just … let me touch you?” “What kind of touching?” she asked. “Do you want me to show you on a doll?” Cath laughed. “Touching,” he said. “I want to touch you. Hold you. I want to sit right next to you, even when there are other options.” She took a deep breath. She felt like she owed it to him to keep talking. To at least reciprocate this conversation. “I want to touch you, too.”

E non importa che lui non sia Mr Muscolo o Brad Pitt.. Viene addirittura descritto come un po' stempiato, ma il mio amore per lui non ha mai vacillato.. Avrebbe potuto essere Gollum per quanto mi riguarda!!

“I didn’t know you had a mother,” he said. “Or a sister. What else are you hiding?” “Five cousins,” Wren said. “And a string of ill-fated hamsters, all named Simon.”

“Don’t send me a link. I’m not much of an Internet person.” Cath felt her eyes get big. She was about to take a sip of her coffee, but stopped. “How do you not like the Internet? That’s like saying, ‘I don’t like things that are convenient. And easy. I don’t like having access to all of mankind’s recorded discoveries at my fingertips. I don’t like light. And knowledge.’” “I like knowledge,” he said. “You’re not a book person. And now you’re not an Internet person? What does that leave you?” Levi laughed. “Life. Work. Class. The great outdoors. Other people.” “Other people,” Cath repeated, shaking her head and taking a sip. “There are other people on the Internet. It’s awesome. You get all the benefits of ‘other people’ without the body odor and the eye contact.”

“Crap, crap, crap. We’re locked out. I don’t have my keys.” “I got ya.” Levi grinned and pulled out his key ring. Her jaw dropped. “You have a key to our room?” “Reagan gave me her spare, for emergencies.” He unlocked the door and held it open for her. “Then why are you always sitting in the hall?” “That’s never an emergency.”

Il loro amore è qualcosa di così dolce, morbido, puro.. E poi non è una storia lampo, anzi! Cath ha mille dubbi, mille paure e una totale inesperienza:

But I don’t think I could actually be with someone like Levi. It would be like interspecies dating.” Reagan let her spoon drop sloppily into her cereal. “What’s wrong with Levi?” “Nothing,” Cath said. “He’s just … not like me.” “You mean, smart?” “Levi’s really smart,” Cath said defensively. “I know,” Reagan said, just as defensively. “He’s different,” Cath said. “He’s older. He smokes. And he drinks. And he’s probably had sex. I mean, he looks like he has.” Reagan raised her eyebrows like Cath was talking crazy. And Cath thought—not for the first time, but for the first time since last night—that Levi had probably had sex with Reagan. “And he likes to be outside,” Cath said, just to change the subject. “And he likes animals. We don’t have anything in common.” “He’s just a guy,” Reagan said. “Of course he’s different from you. You’re never going to find a guy who’s exactly like you—first of all, because that guy never leaves his dorm room.…” “Guys like Levi don’t date girls like me.” “Again—the girl kind?” “Guys like Levi date girls like you.” “And what does that mean?” Reagan asked, tilting her head. “Normal,” Cath said. “Pretty.”

At some point Levi had put his left arm around her and pulled her back against his chest—she’d been fidgeting and rubbing her back on the wall, and Levi just reached behind her and pulled her into him.

I spent four months trying to kiss you and the last six weeks trying to figure out how I managed to fuck everything up. All I want now is to make it right, to make you see how sorry I am and why you should give me another chance. And I just want to know—are you rooting for me? Are you hoping I pull this off?”

“I miss you.” “That’s stupid,” she said. “I saw you this morning.” “It’s not the time,” Levi said, and she could hear that he was smiling. “It’s the distance.”

“I like you here,” he said, squeezing her. “With me.” She smiled, and her eyes started to drift downward. “Cather…” Back up to his eyes. “You know that I’m falling in love with you, right?”

“You’re beautiful,” she said. “That’s you.” “Don’t argue with me. You’re beautiful.”


Levi con Cath. Aaaaw. Li adoro.

Una delle scene più dolci, tenere e forse anche romantiche di tutti i tempi è quando Cath legge per Levi, che ha problemi con i libri (tanto che studia ascoltando le registrazioni fatte in classe..).

“How do you get through any of your classes?” Cath had hours of assigned reading, almost every single night. “Coping strategies.” “Such as?” “I record my lectures and listen to them later. Professors usually cover most of what’s on the test in class. And I find study groups.” “And you lean on Reagan—” “Not just Reagan.” He grinned. “I’m really good at quickly identifying the smartest girl in every class.” Cath frowned at him. “God, Levi, that’s so exploitive.” “How is it exploitive? I don’t make them wear miniskirts. I don’t call them ‘baby.’ I just say, ‘Hello, smart girl, would you like to talk to me about Great Expectations?” “They probably think you like them.” “I do like them.” “If it wasn’t exploitive, you’d harass smart boys, too—” “I do, in a pinch. Do you feel exploited, Cather?” He was still grinning at her over his coffee cup. “No,” she said, “I know that you don’t like me.” “You don’t know anything.”

Ero lì con gli occhi a cuoricino e tanta voglia di uscire e abbracciare gli alberi, giuro!



Reagan, la compagna di stanza di Cath, è mitologica. E' un personaggio secondario, ma vividissimo.. Mi ha fatto riderissimo con certe uscite!
Inoltre, cosa rara di questi tempi,  udite udite, non indossa una taglia 38, ma è comunque bellissima.

“Are you on drugs?” “No.” “Maybe you should be..”

“I feel sorry for you, and I’m going to be your friend.” “I don’t want to be your friend,” Cath said as sternly as she could. “I like that we’re not friends.” “Me, too,” Reagan said. “I’m sorry you ruined it by being so pathetic.”

Reagan wore eyeliner all the way around her eyes. Like a hard-ass Kate Middleton. And even though she was bigger than most girls—big hips, big chest, wide shoulders—she carried herself like she was exactly the size everyone else wanted to be. And everyone else went along with it.

“Get dressed,” Reagan said. “And don’t argue with me. I’m not playing this game with you.” “What game?” “You’re a sad little hermit, and it creeps me out. So get dressed. We’re going bowling.”

Reagan sat at the end of her own bed. “He’s not my boyfriend,” she said solemnly. “And I knew he liked you—he was here constantly. I just didn’t know that you liked him back.” “I thought he was here constantly because he was your boyfriend,” Cath said. “I didn’t want to like him back. I tried to be mean to him.” “I thought you were just mean,” Reagan said. “I liked that about you.”

Fossi stata Cath, mi sarebbe piaciuto avere una compagna di stanza come lei.. Anche se con tutta probabilità all'inzio mi avrebbe spaventato a morte e fatto venire tremila complessi..

Rainbow  (aaaaw. Oddio, questo nome è meraviglioso! Amore amore amore!!) poi scrive in una maniera fantastica: ironico, dolce, delicato.. Quello che cercate in una brava autrice, Rainbow lo possiede!!
Mi ha fatto sognare, mi ha appassionato tantissimo!!

Onorevole di menzione è Simon Snow, ipotetica saga su cui Cath scrive fanfiction.. I richiami ad Harry Potter sono TANTISSIMI e intrecciati in modo mirabolante.. Mi ha divertito tantissimo!

“Snow!” Baz shouted. A spell book sailed past Simon’s nose. “What are you thinking?” Simon asked, genuinely surprised. Flying books and curses were fair game in the hallways and classrooms and, well, everywhere else. But if Baz tried to hurt him inside their room—“The Roommate’s Anathema,” Simon said. “You’ll be expelled.” “Which is why I missed. I know the rules,” Baz muttered, rubbing his eyes. “Did you know, Snow, that if your roommate dies during the school year, they give you top marks, just out of sympathy?” “That’s a myth,” Simon said. “Lucky for you I’m already getting top marks.” Simon stopped pacing to really look at his roommate. Normally he liked to pretend that Baz wasn’t here. Normally, Baz wasn’t here. Unless he was spying or plotting, Baz hated to be in their room. He said it smelled like good intentions.

Ogni volta che c'era una parte dedicata a Simon Snow, mi immaginavo Simon e Baz (suo acerrimo nemico!) come Harry e Draco..! E l'ossessione, l'amore e la passione di Cath per Simon Snow mi hanno tanto ricordato i miei stessi sentimenti per Harry:

They were just stories, but stories weren’t just anything. Simon wasn’t just.

“You’ve read the books?” “I’ve seen the movies.” Cath rolled her eyes so hard, it hurt. (Actually.) (Maybe because she was still on the edge of tears. On the edge, period.) “So you haven’t read the books.” “I’m not really a book person.” “That might be the most idiotic thing you’ve ever said to me.”

Ovviamente la storia è un po' diversa, sennò si chiamerebbe plagio (:D), però trovo l'abbia ripresa in modo ottimale.. Insomma, Simon e Baz alla fine erano quasi dei personaggi al pari di Cath e Levi, non so se rendo! E mi è piaciuto tantissimo che la storia non fosse raccontata solo indirettamente ma che fossero presenti veri e propri "stralci" della serie (e relative fanfiction!!).
Il tutto mi ha portato a riprendere in mano la serie di Harry Potter.. Ho sentito il bisogno quasi fisico di leggere a salti alcune pagine della Rowling ç_ç
Ora dovrò decidermi a riprendere con tutti i crismi il V, che nella mia missione di ri-ri-ri-ri-ri-ri (aggiungete quanti "ri" volete :D) lettura, non sono riuscita a riprendere.. Credo di essere diventata una debole, ma la morte di Sirius, l'indifferenza di Silente, la rabbia di Harry mi fanno male al cuore  **Ho messo sotto spoiler alcune scene del V di HP, non credo ma sia mai qualcuno non lo abbia letto.. Ci sarebbero gli estremi per uccidermi!! :D*
Una cosa che ha fatto schizzare alle stelle il mio amore (come se fosse già stato poco..) è la scena in cui esce l'ultimo attesissimo volume della saga di Simon Snow.. Ecco, mi ha TROPPO ricordato me stessa quando ho comprato I doni della morte. Insomma, mi stava piangendo il cuore, non volevo realmente credere che tutto stava per terminare.. ç_ç
Cath stepped away from the register, trying to get out of the way, clutching the book with both hands. There was an illustration of Simon on the front, holding up the Sword of Mages under a sky full of stars. “Are you okay?” she heard someone— Levi?—ask. “Hey … are you crying?” Cath ran her fingers along the cover, over the raised gold type. Then someone else ran right into her, pushing the book into Cath’s chest. Pushing two books into her chest. Cath looked up just as Wren threw an arm around her. “They’re both crying,” Cath heard Reagan say. “I can’t even watch.” Cath freed an arm to wrap around her sister. “I can’t believe it’s really over,” she whispered. Wren held her tight and shook her head. She really was crying, too. “Don’t be so melodramatic, Cath,” Wren laughed hoarsely. “It’s never over.… It’s Simon.”

AH!! Quasi dimenticavo! Se pure non avessi avuto motivi sufficienti per adorare il libro, Rainbow mi ha conquistata con la scelta dei nomi dei suoi personaggi:

“Levi,” Cath said, “this is my sister, Wren.” Wren held out her hand. Levi’s eyes were as wide as Cath’d ever seen them. He grinned at Wren and took her hand, shaking it. “Wren,” he said. “Such fascinating names in your family.” “Our mom didn’t know she was having twins,” Wren said. “And she didn’t feel like coming up with another name.” “Cather, Wren…” Levi looked like he’d just now discovered sliced bread. “Catherine.” Cath rolled her eyes. Wren just smiled. “Clever, right?”

**Edit a 4 giorni dalla lettura: Siccome mi ritengo una persona piuttosto razionale (non al 100%, questo mai.. Ma un pizzico di razionalità posso vantarla! :D), passato l'attimo di gioia estrema ed euforia da lettura, mi rendo ben conto che la trama del libro non è nulla di mitologico, che la storia è parecchio semplice, se vogliamo.. Ma niente, niente, niente, niente mi farà cambiare idea sul libro. Ormai è nella top 5 dei miei preferiti, il posto se l'è guadagnato.. Chi sono io per togliergli questo privilegio?!
Solo che, niente, sento una specie di spada di Damocle/super responsabilità sul groppone in quanto mi sto sperticando in lodi per questo libro e non vorrei rimaneste tutti delusissimi e mi guardaste così:


:D Siate consapevoli del mio livello di adorazione, non rimangio niente e continuo a sponsorizzarlo!!! :D**

Ok, ora ci sarebbe il momento delle citazioni dal libro.. Sono TANTISSIME, me ne rendo conto.. Ma non ho potuto fare a meno di riportarle, mi piacciono tutte per poter scegliere!! :3
(L'ultima mi ha intenerito tantissimo.. E' lunghetta, ma c'è tutto Levi e tutta Cath da gustare.. Dolcissimi!!)

“Are you meeting people?” Yeah, she thought, you people. “Not intentionally,” she said.

The squirrels on campus were beyond domestic; they were practically domestically abusive. If you were eating anything at all, they’d come right up to you and chit-chit-chit in your space.

And she thought about winning. About how she was letting this win, whatever this was—the crazy inside of her. Cath, zero. Crazy, one million.

“And I don’t have a weird thing with Simon Snow,” Cath said. “I’m just really active in the fandom.” “What the fuck is ‘the fandom’?” “You wouldn’t understand,” Cath sighed, wishing she hadn’t used that word, knowing that if she tried to explain herself any further, it would just make it worse. Reagan wouldn’t believe—or understand—that Cath wasn’t just a Simon fan. She was one of the fans. A first-name-only fan with fans of her own.

So far, being Reagan’s charity case didn’t require much—just going down to the dining hall together and helping Reagan ridicule everyone who walked by their table.

“Dad. Why haven’t you called me? I left you a million messages.” “You left me too many messages. You shouldn’t be calling me or even thinking about me. You’re in college now. Move on.” “It’s just school, Dad. It’s not like we have irreconcilable differences.” “Honey, I’ve watched a lot of 90210. The parents weren’t even on the show once Brandon and Brenda went to college. This is your time—you’re supposed to be going to frat parties and getting back together with Dylan.” “Why does everybody want me to go to frat parties?” “Who wants you to go to frat parties? I was just kidding. Don’t hang out with frat guys, Cath, they’re terrible. All they do is get drunk and watch 90210.”

He looked up at her and smiled crookedly, holding out a few sheets of paper. “Will you read this? I think maybe it sucks. Or maybe it’s awesome. It’s probably awesome. Tell me it’s awesome, okay? Unless it sucks.”

“How can the fact that your identical twin sister is super hot be offensive to you?” “Because,” Cath said, still too encouraged by Wren and, weirdly, by Abel, and maybe even by Nick to let this get to her right now. “It makes me feel like the Ugly One.” “You’re not the ugly one.” Levi grinned. “You’re just the Clark Kent.”

“Do you want to kiss him?” “I don’t want to kiss a stranger,” Cath would answer. “I’m not interested in lips out of context.” It was only partly true. Ever since Abel had broken up with her … Ever since Nick had started sitting next to her … Cath kept noticing things. Boys. Guys. Everywhere. Seriously, everywhere.

“I have a right to get upset about upsetting things.”

“Nine-one-one is for emergencies!” Cath shouted. It was so loud in here, you had to shout; it made it way too easy to lose your temper.

“The whole point of fanfiction,” she said, “is that you get to play inside somebody else’s universe. Rewrite the rules. Or bend them.

Cath shuddered, and her dad squeezed her tight. “When I think about her coming here,” she said, “it’s like that scene in Fellowship of the Ring when the hobbits are hiding from the Nazgûl.” “Your mother isn’t evil, Cath.” “That’s just how I feel.” He was quiet for a few seconds. “Me, too.”

Her brain wasn’t keeping track of anything but how warm he was. How warm her roommate’s boyfriend was. One of her roommate’s boyfriends. Did that matter? If Reagan had three boyfriends, did that mean this was only one-third wrong? Just leaning against Levi probably wasn’t wrong. But leaning against him because he was warm and not-exactly-soft … Wrong.

When she and Wren divided up their clothes, Wren had taken anything that said “party at a boy’s place” or “leaving the house.” Cath had taken everything that said “up all night writing” or “it’s okay to spill tea on this.”

Cath stood as close as she could to Reagan’s back and tried not to be obvious about looking for Levi. (Inside her head, Cath was standing on tiptoe with her hand over her eyes, scanning the horizon for ships.)

What had she been thinking—that Levi really liked her? How could she have believed that, especially after she’d spent the last two days explaining to herself all the reasons he never would.

“That’s great,” Cath said, trying not to let her face show how much she wanted to kiss and kill him.

She didn’t tell Nick that writing love stories was her thing. Her one true thing. And that his anti-love story read like somebody’s very first fanfic—Mary Sue to the tenth power. That the main character was obviously Nick and that the girl was obviously Winona Ryder plus Natalie Portman plus Selena Gomez.

Cath wanted, desperately, to escape to the Internet. Just to check her e-mail or something. But she wouldn’t let herself open a browser window, not even to check whether the b in “Brussels” should be capitalized.

With everything that had happened, Cath wasn’t quite sure whether she and Wren were on speaking terms. She decided that they were; it made life easier. But they weren’t on sharing terms

I followed Wren to Lincoln, and she doesn’t even want me there. Nobody wants me there.” “Tell me about it,” he said. “Tell me why you’re so unhappy.” “It’s just … everything. There are too many people. And I don’t fit in. I don’t know how to be. Nothing that I’m good at is the sort of thing that matters there. Being smart doesn’t matter—and being good with words. And when those things do matter, it’s only because people want something from me. Not because they want me.”

Just … isn’t giving up allowed sometimes? Isn’t it okay to say, ‘This really hurts, so I’m going to stop trying’?” “It sets a dangerous precedent.” “For avoiding pain?” “For avoiding life.”

“I know that I’m part of the reason you want to move home. I know that you worry about me, and that I give you lots of reasons to worry about me.…” She wanted to look away, but his eyes were unshakable sometimes, just like Wren’s. “Cath, if you’re really worried about me, I’m begging you, go back to school. Because if you drop out because of me, if you lose your scholarship, if you set yourself back— because of me—I won’t be able to live with myself.”

And I wish I could go back to that morning, when I woke up here, and have a stern talk with myself, so that the rest of this crap wouldn’t have happened.” “I wonder…,” she said, “if there was such a thing as time machines, would anyone ever use them to go the future?”

“It’s okay if you’re crazy,” he said softly. “You don’t even know—” “I don’t have to know,” he said. “I’m rooting for you.”

Reagan was sitting at Cath’s desk when Cath woke up. “Are you awake?” “Have you been watching me sleep?” “Yes, Bella. Are you awake?” “No.”

“What’s the plan?” she asked. He grinned. “My plan is to do things that make you want to hang out with me again tomorrow. What’s your plan?” “I’m going to try not to make an ass of myself.” He grinned. “So we’re all set.”

“Up until about a month ago, I thought you were kissing Reagan all the time.” “How could you think that? She’s seeing, like, five other guys.” “I thought you were one of them.” “But I was always flirting with you.” He pushed Cath’s hands forward for emphasis. “You flirt with everything.” She could tell that her eyes were popping—her eyeballs actually felt cold around the edges. “You flirt with old people and babies and everybody in between.” “Oh, I do not.…” He tucked his chin into his neck indignantly. “You do so,” she said, pushing his hands back. “That night at the bowling alley? You flirted with every human being in the building. I’m surprised the shoe guy didn’t give you his number.” “I was just being nice.” “You’re extra nice. With everyone. You go out of your way to make everyone feel special.” “Well, what’s wrong with that?” “How is anyone supposed to know that they are special? How was I supposed to know you weren’t just being nice?”

If only he were a better reader, Cath thought, he could have been a proper nerd. Well … maybe. To really be a nerd, she’d decided, you had to prefer fictional worlds to the real one.

Cath held him even tighter. He was good. He was good, and she didn’t want to lose him. Not that she felt like she was going to lose him on the interstate. Just, in general. In general, she didn’t want to lose him.

“Does it bother you when I talk about Reagan?” he asked. “I’m the one who brought her up.” “Does it?” “A little,” Cath said. “Tell me more about your mom.” “I finally get you up to a room, and now we’re talking about my ex-girlfriend and my mom.” Cath smiled down at the pillow.

“Geez, Cather, if you need a break, just tell me.” Levi was lying on her dorm-room bed, and he’d just told her that he was going home for a few days for his sister’s birthday party—and instead of saying I’ll miss you or even Have fun, Cath had said, “Oh, that’s perfect.”

“Okay,” she said, “unless something goes incredibly wrong, you should have the room to yourself tonight. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” “I haven’t so far,” Cath said dryly.

The more that Levi touched her hand, the more that it tickled. She stretched out her fingers and took a soft breath. “Feel nice?” he asked, looking up at her with his eyes without lifting his head. She nodded again. If he kept touching her, she wouldn’t be able to do even that; she’d have to blink once for yes, twice for no.

“Don’t expect me to tell you apart,” Reagan said when this became a routine. “I have short hair,” Wren said, “and she wears glasses.”

“I totally think Basil’s going to die in the last movie,” Courtney said, putting on her jacket. “Simon has to kill him—he’s a vampire.” “He’ll have to die in the last book first,” Cath said. She still couldn’t tell whether Courtney was actually stupid or whether she just couldn’t be bothered to think before she talked.

“Look, I just need to talk to you,” he said. “It won’t take long.” “So talk,” Wren said. “Yeah,” Reagan said, leaning against the doorjamb. “Talk.” Nick looked like he was waiting for Cath to bail him out, but she wasn’t in the mood. She thought about walking away and leaving him here to deal with Reagan and Wren, who were difficult and unpleasant a lot of the time even if they liked you.

Cath grinned at Levi. “Are you okay?” he asked, grinning back because he couldn’t help it. (Bless him. Bless him to infinity and beyond.)

“Why, then?” he asked. “Doesn’t Wren like me? Do I cramp your style? I can tell you don’t want me around when she’s there.” Cath pushed against his chest, away, and went back to the stove, quickly grating the cheese over the eggs. “It has nothing to with you.” Levi tried to move into her line of sight, leaning against the counter next to the stove. “How do you figure?” “It’s just … nothing, it’s weird,” she said. “It’d be different if you’d grown up with us, or if you’d met us both at the same time—” “What would be different?” Cath shrugged and scraped at the omelette with a wooden spatula. “Then I would know that you had enough information to choose me.” Levi leaned over the stove, trying again to catch her eye. “Get back,” Cath said, “you’re going to burn yourself.” He backed up, but only few inches. “Of course I chose you.” “But you didn’t know Wren.” “Cath…” She wished there was more to do with omelettes than watch them. “I know you think she’s pretty—” “You know that because I think you’re pretty.” “You said she was hot.” “When?” “When you met her.” Levi looked confused for a second, one eyebrow arched beautifully. “You called her Superman,” Cath said. “Cather,” he said, remembering, “I was trying to get your attention. I was trying to say that you were hot without actually saying it.” “Well, it sucked.” “I’m sorry.” He reached out for her waist again. She kept looking down at the eggs. “I know that you like me,” she said. “You know that I love you.” Cath kept staring at the pan. “But she’s a lot like me. Some of our best friends couldn’t even tell us apart. And then, when they could, it would be because Wren was the better one. Because she talked more or smiled more—or just flat-out looked better.” “I can tell you apart just fine.” “Long hair. Glasses.” “Cath … come on, look at me.” He pulled at her belt loops, and she flipped the omelette before she let herself turn toward him. “I can tell you apart,” he said. “We sound the same. We kind of talk the same. We have all the same gestures.” “True,” he said, nodding, holding her chin up, “but it’s almost like that makes your differences more dramatic.” “What do you mean?” “It means, sometimes your sister will say something, and it will sort of shock me to hear her saying it with your voice.” Cath looked up to his eyes, tentatively. They were big and earnest. “Like what?” “I can’t think of anything specific,” he said. “It’s like … she smiles more than you. But she’s harder somehow. Closed up.” “I’m the one who never leaves my room.” “I’m not explaining this right.… I like Wren,” he said, “what I know of her. But she’s more … forceful than you.” “Confident.” “Partly. Maybe. More like—she takes what she wants from a situation.” “There’s nothing wrong with that.” “No, I know.” Levi said. “But it’s not you. You don’t push through every moment. You pay attention. You take everything in. I like that about you—I like that better.” Cath closed her eyes and felt tears catch on her cheeks. “I like your glasses,” he said. “I like your Simon Snow T-shirts. I like that you don’t smile at everyone, because then, when you smile at me.… Cather.” He kissed her mouth. “Look at me.” She did. “I choose you over everyone.” Cath took a painful breath and reached up with one hand to touch his chin. “I love you,” she said. “Levi.” Levi’s face broke open just before he kissed her. He pulled away again a few seconds later.… “Say it again.”
Trama Cath is a Simon Snow fan. Okay, the whole world is a Simon Snow fan . . . But for Cath, being a fan is her life — and she’s really good at it. She and her twin sister, Wren, ensconced themselves in the Simon Snow series when they were just kids; it’s what got them through their mother leaving. Reading. Rereading. Hanging out in Simon Snow forums, writing Simon Snow fan fiction, dressing up like the characters for every movie premiere. Cath’s sister has mostly grown away from fandom, but Cath can’t let go. She doesn’t want to. Now that they’re going to college, Wren has told Cath she doesn’t want to be roommates. Cath is on her own, completely outside of her comfort zone. She’s got a surly roommate with a charming, always-around boyfriend, a fiction-writing professor who thinks fan fiction is the end of the civilized world, a handsome classmate who only wants to talk about words . . . And she can’t stop worrying about her dad, who’s loving and fragile and has never really been alone. For Cath, the question is: Can she do this? Can she make it without Wren holding her hand? Is she ready to start living her own life? Writing her own stories? And does she even want to move on if it means leaving Simon Snow behind?

28 commenti:

  1. Capperi, la recensione è più azzurra che altro! XD
    Si vede proprio che hai amato questo libro... non l'avevo mai sentito nominare prima, ma il tuo entusiasmo contagioso è più che sufficiente a farmelo desiderare. Storia semplice o meno ^_^

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. Ahahaahahahaha! VERO! Mi sono lasciata prendere la mano.. Però sì, giuro, l'ho adorato alla follia!!
      Son contenta di aver trasmesso entusiasmo!! ç_ç

      Elimina
  2. Avevo già intenzione di leggerlo, ma la tua recensione mi ha convinta ancora di più!
    Mi ritrovo anche io maledettamente nelle descrizioni di Cath... e nella reazione all'uscita del libro di Simon Snow!
    ... Harryy çOç
    Mel

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. Ooooh! Carina!! *_*
      Davvero ti ritrovi in Cath? :DD
      Mi sento meno sola del previsto!!!!
      E Harry.. Aaaaw ♥

      Elimina
    2. Dalle citazioni che hai postato mi ci ritrovo eccome!
      Ti potrò dire di più una volta letto il libro (MIO. MIO!)

      Elimina
    3. Sorella!! ç_ç
      XD

      Anche io lo voglio. Non è giusto, che è sta cosa che tocca aspettare fino al 10 settembre!!

      Elimina
  3. non avevo mai sentito questo libro ma mi hai convinta..gli darò una possibilità...T'invidio un po' sai' (in senso buono) è tanto che un libro non mi prende per lo stomaco in questo modo

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. ♥ Sì, sono innamorata e contenta!!
      Vedi che prestissimo lo trovi anche tu un libro così!!! :))

      Elimina
  4. Va bene, lo voglio. Strano eh?!
    <3

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. Aaaaw! No, non è strano! E' giusto! AHAHAHA!! ♥

      Elimina
  5. Sono entusiasta di tutto ciò!!!!!!!!!!!! *-* Sento già una forte affinità con questo libro e -ti giuro- la protagonista da come l'hai descritta somiglia molto anche a me!!! Che bello!!! :-)))))))))))) Questo romanzo mi piace mi piace mi piace!!!! Mi hai contagiato ;-)

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. Ooooh! Un'altra Cath!!! Sììììì!!!
      Cath di tutto il mondo, uniamoci! :DD
      Quindi ho atteso le aspettative? Non sai che ansia ahahahaha!!


      Mi stra-piace anche a me! Ma credo si fosse capito ahaha!! :DD

      Elimina
  6. SETTEMBREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ç-ç Lo voglio, devo averlo, voglio coccolarlo per tutta la notte. Ma Cath e Levi?*^* Dio, adoro già questo libro!

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. Coccolarlo!!
      oooh! MI PIACE! Credo lo farò!! haahahaha!
      Anzi, ne compro due copie, così se una si rovina nel coccolamento, amen!! Ahahaha!! :DD

      Sììììì Ele, brava, lasciati contagiare dall'amore per questo libro!!!!!

      Elimina
    2. Due copie? Il tuo è un amore costoso! Mi piace xD

      Elimina
    3. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!1
      Ovvio u.u
      Uno se deve fare le cose deve farle bene!! :DD

      Elimina
  7. Non l'avevo mai sentito nominare, ma ora ho voglia di leggerlo pure io *-*

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. :3 Esce a settembre!! *_*
      Faccio proseliti per il libro haaha!!! :DD

      Elimina
  8. Mi ispira un sacco! Dell'autrice ho letto 'Per l'amore basta un click' e l'ho trovato adorabile, quindi le premesse ci sono tutte :3

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. Nooooo considera che mi hai aperto un mondo con il libro in italiano!! Meraviglioso!!
      Bravissima, 'adorabile' è la parola giusta per Rainbow!! *_*

      Elimina
  9. ohmygod lo voglio, ma che dico lo esigo! non la smettevo di leggere citazioni su citazioni, come se stessi leggendo il libro realmente :')

    RispondiElimina
  10. Sembra decisamente carino e molto tenero :) Ne avevo già sentito parlare, ma la tua è una delle opinioni più appassionate, eheh!

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. Sìììì è tenerissimo!!! ç_ç

      E' per sfatare il mito che io scrivo solo recensioni negative ehehe :DD

      Elimina
  11. Arrivo sempre in ritardo *vergogna* ma ho ripreso da poco la mia attività nella blogosfera e sto cercando di capire quanto mi sono persa *_*
    Insomma, quello che voglio dire è: dopo una recensione così, devo averlo. Punto. Grazie <3

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. Ooooh! *___*
      Ma grazie a te!!! E tranquilla che non è mai troppo tardi, mi ha fatto piacerissimo il tuo commento!!! ^^

      Elimina
  12. Scusate maaaaaa c'é anche in italiano? (:

    RispondiElimina
    Risposte
    1. ,purtroppo ancora no... Ma credo lo vedremo presto!! :)

      Elimina